Thursday, May 07, 2009

Shul seating

In our shul we usually sit at tables, as in this picture. When we need extra space, the tables are stored in the basement, and we sit in rows, like this.

A few weeks ago, we had a Bar Mitzvah, and many guests were expected. To accomodate them the tables were stored away, aside for one that was moved flush against a side wall, like this. (The green box is the table. The lines represent the rows of chairs)

When I came in that Shabbos morning (a little late) (shut up) one guy had turned his chair sideways and was sitting at the table, with his back toward the room (see here; he is the red circle. The arrow indicates the direction he was facing.)

Now of course this guy is an idiot, but exactly what kind of idiot? I came up with some possibilities:
  • Pious moron (Heimish Torah-true Jews must always pray at tables!)
  • Insecure moron (Oy, how my children will suffer if word gets out that I once sat in a pew like those modern YI Jews)
  • Slothful moron (What? Sitting this way is more comfortable!)
  • Uncooperative moron (Just who in the samhell do those gabbaim think they are rearranging the shul like this? Was the Rabbi informed?)
  • Clueless moron (I was supposed to sit in the rows like everyone else? Oopsie!)
  • Glutenous moron (If I sit in the rows, I won't be able to escape for mid-prayer kiddush)
Probably, its some combination of the above; additionally I confess to pointing him out to a friend with the words, "Hey look, its George Costanza."

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